[Life] Craving for a Change

I think I'm going back to God, I somehow feel closer to Him again.

But I'm keeping myself away from some people. I distanced myself from my family and my close friends, those who are supposed to be close to me, who used to share my joy and my sorrow. I sometimes don't even feel like going back home nor going back to school.

I don't feel like returning to where I belong, or where I used to belong, because I don't think I belong here anymore. I couldn't feel that way anymore.

And I exactly heard what my mind was saying - let's change.

I need a change of the same old environment. I think I can adapt to new situations better than to stuck with the same old place back in here. I want a total change, people and place.

I've graduated from my high school, which means I'm no longer a high school student, I'm leaving my school, leaving the teachers, leaving my juniors behind, leaving my friends. People say friends are for you to lean on. Well, sometimes I have to admit it, but it doesn't mean that you can depend on them anytime and anywhere. You got what I mean? You have to depend on yourself, you're living on your own, walking your own path after all, it has nothing to do with them.

I'm unconsciously keeping myself away from them, because I don't feel the need to depend on them mentally. Practically, I still need to keep in touch with them, who knows they might help me in my future, that's what public relations and communication experts do, because they are useful to us, or they might be.

Am I independent? I'm not interested to answer this question. I'm only trying my best to stand alone, to depend less on people (for my inner thoughts and feelings), because they aren't really that good, you know, they aren't there when you really need them. That is why, you just have to train yourself up to loosen your grip.

I'm not really that distant, pals. But you'll understand what I mean, because you're just like me.